tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37373095143120051492023-11-16T03:04:02.642-08:00The Rev's FamilyA(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.comBlogger93125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-53703091681610516702020-12-16T03:32:00.004-08:002020-12-16T03:38:15.183-08:00Christmas Letter 2020<p> <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjheevlU1_GFFnDji3qui9IA0qJLRn8AUCJdojW6WVOyijMX9CZfpyWtrH7WoaV8Oz6gBNy58FjygrchWdHSf_28acX81Jz-UVOBFmDodd6HfzRA1wrJSannMPgLigb18_CTaOyLslZxB8/s1424/IMG_2347.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1424" data-original-width="1367" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjheevlU1_GFFnDji3qui9IA0qJLRn8AUCJdojW6WVOyijMX9CZfpyWtrH7WoaV8Oz6gBNy58FjygrchWdHSf_28acX81Jz-UVOBFmDodd6HfzRA1wrJSannMPgLigb18_CTaOyLslZxB8/s320/IMG_2347.jpg" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">'Holly Night' by Abigail</td></tr></tbody></table></p><p><br /></p><p>Dear Friends,</p><p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">I told myself that I
would try to avoid words such as 'unprecedented', 'lockdown' and
'Zoom' in this Christmas letter, but since such things seem to be
unavoidable, you are welcome to make yourselves a bingo card and
cross all such predictable words off as we go.</p>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">March (because who can
remember anything that happened before March?) found Amy sitting in a
Premier Inn in Coventry with a puppet, watching the news and
wondering whether this might have been a bad time to attempt a tour
of schools to promote her Gladstone the Gargoyle books. (Narrator: it
was, indeed, a very bad time, and she got no further.) Tiffer,
meanwhile, spent the month on the phone, working out how church was
going to happen not just in his own four parishes, but also across the
deanery. We both learned to use Zoom.</p>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">The children dealt
admirably with lockdown learning, managing a daily dose of numeracy,
English and what we called 'Project' which covered everything else.
We did not watch Joe Wicks. Amy was reminded daily of why she gave up
teaching in the first place. One of Jeremy's fractions worksheets received <a href="https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10103627317668480&set=pb.36917483.-2207520000..&type=3" target="_blank">dozens of comments</a> on Facebook from baffled people with degrees in
mathematics.</p>
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<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">All
travel plans cancelled, we managed a few lovely outings on the boat,
fell in love with St Ives (Cambridgeshire, not Cornwall) and learned
all the places on the Great Ouse where you have to watch out for
swimmers. Tiffer, ever handier with the old engine, fixed an oil leak
and fiddled with the stern gland. We 'drove to New Wine' by packing the car, having a drive through Macdonald's, driving home again and putting up the tent in the garden. We transformed our
patio into a socially distanced outdoor living room. Jeremy and
Tiffer <a href="https://twitter.com/tifferrobinson/status/1262469723809288193?s=20" target="_blank">made a Hero's engine</a> out of a beer can over the chiminea. It
exploded.</p><p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;"><br /></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZBokeE0gOhXOfd2VQeEYH7mT60Jy7294HDo7fTESydVHnYKFkOcvF7ODgPAoCu147TuiJm0fgv_khyxbcq_R847VKgMfzvsFjcM1HHQ7LHQywGyv0_o0BsQK_bzhwa8KsJZmXeSQgblw/s960/blog4.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZBokeE0gOhXOfd2VQeEYH7mT60Jy7294HDo7fTESydVHnYKFkOcvF7ODgPAoCu147TuiJm0fgv_khyxbcq_R847VKgMfzvsFjcM1HHQ7LHQywGyv0_o0BsQK_bzhwa8KsJZmXeSQgblw/s320/blog4.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">'Driving to New Wine'</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGuQprggnktnJMFKxjb0OiujKMnlw4uLIbIC7s7tRKXgsQ-uOO7be7rf6OfP_ii5Vv8jF5FvuzOey-R-rkokNbUgLDNW0FD59Hiapofd8HGkz4uSpVy9EfALxEB-_0wRU0dvaHfCRrfo8/s960/blog5.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGuQprggnktnJMFKxjb0OiujKMnlw4uLIbIC7s7tRKXgsQ-uOO7be7rf6OfP_ii5Vv8jF5FvuzOey-R-rkokNbUgLDNW0FD59Hiapofd8HGkz4uSpVy9EfALxEB-_0wRU0dvaHfCRrfo8/s320/blog5.jpg" /></a></div><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn48NzjfgyYb95hmWm8vp-axPYG7emqmxhUDXuSfQULzH6-BPcUUAxCENZWQo8rnERlOfyn3fQ8syhcsENFmFmobCPdlYAhAnRnEQ66IkLvP5fp3wRJimPfqpiA-8EdTztsIAc_KUrCJY/s960/blog6.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn48NzjfgyYb95hmWm8vp-axPYG7emqmxhUDXuSfQULzH6-BPcUUAxCENZWQo8rnERlOfyn3fQ8syhcsENFmFmobCPdlYAhAnRnEQ66IkLvP5fp3wRJimPfqpiA-8EdTztsIAc_KUrCJY/s320/blog6.jpg" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Man in his element</td></tr></tbody></table>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">With every change in
restrictions, Tiffer, now known to many as the Covid-19 regulation
geek, went back into interpretation of guidance and reimagination of
services. He produced a hybrid weekly communion in which the Zoomers,
plugged into the church sound system, could participate fully with
readings, prayers and songs for the Roomers, masked and distanced in
the building; and the whole thing is simultaneously streamed to
Facebook. There's nothing like preaching a sermon in the knowledge
that it may well <a href="https://www.facebook.com/rattlesdenbenefice/videos" target="_blank">last forever on the internet</a>.</p>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">Amy, whose muse jumped
ship very early on as a result of being surrounded by children 24/7,
was pleased to be able to sign a two-book deal with Lion for work
already half completed, and to continue writing an occasional <a href="https://www.churchtimes.co.uk/search-results?query=Amy%20Scott%20Robinson" target="_blank">Diary column for the Church Times</a>. The last couple of months of the year
were taken up in sharing <a href="https://engageworship.org/ideas/tiny-advent-poems#" target="_blank">Advent poetry</a> written for Engage Worship,
which has been used by many churches looking for <a href="https://engageworship.org/store/product/worship-in-the-waiting-church-service-pack" target="_blank">online resources.</a></p>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">Jeremy has continued
his trombone lessons with his long-suffering teacher over video chat,
despite his love of pulling faces when he sees himself on screen, and <a href="https://youtu.be/SNGrBynOCpc" target="_blank">here he is performing a carol</a>; and
Abigail, now a year 6 and deputy head girl, skilfully led her hybrid
congregation as Girl Bishop at the St Nicholas' Day service, the
recording of which <a href="https://www.facebook.com/268599366615334/videos/436092757522358" target="_blank">can still be seen</a> on the church Facebook page (6<sup>th</sup>
December).</p>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">And thus finishes this
unprecedented (Bingo!) year. May the next one bring good changes.</p>
<p class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">Lots of love from all
we Robinsons xxx</p>A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-60340792356679809372017-06-22T07:43:00.000-07:002017-06-22T07:43:27.989-07:00Plenty of ears<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<i>We're walking home from school. As usual, Jeremy is talking constantly on one side of me, and Abigail is keeping up her own monologue on the other.</i><br />
<br />
Me: I really can't listen to both of you at the same time!<br />
<br />
Abi: But you have two ears. Use one ear for me and one ear for Jem Jem.<br />
<br />
Me: My ears can hear you, but my brain can't sort out what you're saying!<br />
<br />
Abi: Well, use your ears inside that.<br />
<br />
Me: I don't think I have any more ears inside that!<br />
<br />
Abi: I have a whole museum of ears.<br />
<br />
Me: A museum of ears?! That may be one of the strangest things I've heard all day.<br />
<br />
Abi: It's an ear room. I can hear the wind rustling AND that car driving at the same time. So you see, I have plenty of ears.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-63448139091188882452017-06-04T09:47:00.000-07:002017-06-04T09:47:58.095-07:00Half term on the boat<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
We're just back from a lovely half term holiday on board St Hilda. We went all the way from Beccles to Wroxham and back, and met up with some lovely friends too.<br />
<br />
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It's the first time that we've spent four nights on board. Hilda doesn't have a shower, so TheRev and I used expensive ones at marinas and the children stayed grubby until the last day, when we went swimming. They didn't seem to mind...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrMe7dZWgXNDhZD_UWw2hp0IeRwpcy5CPUw7oxfs_OyN31CYPGvsTKSarbZIr-BCwRAgu4ff8WDCoa4f5HSE17Q3QX9CqquyCZBXmDLrDETOmvUr0QZPHZ_XBt2QJ6qu8RMgVFkfhu624/s1600/IMG_7139.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrMe7dZWgXNDhZD_UWw2hp0IeRwpcy5CPUw7oxfs_OyN31CYPGvsTKSarbZIr-BCwRAgu4ff8WDCoa4f5HSE17Q3QX9CqquyCZBXmDLrDETOmvUr0QZPHZ_XBt2QJ6qu8RMgVFkfhu624/s320/IMG_7139.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Abi enjoyed being tall enough to see out of the hatch! Maybe next year, Jeremy?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
We had mostly warm weather, some blue skies and one torrential downpour.<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8ymYESnaXAritMZA4fzpYVk4xStqYeHZ8Z2RThZ9iWp3_yfi97blU3oo-DTGbIweZze4C0NX_Q256BgfeNlzCYIN4uiLZwMQvYArEF4GH229bPIQNyhsOocqIML24-ImuW-EM8UGJvK0/s1600/IMG_7180.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8ymYESnaXAritMZA4fzpYVk4xStqYeHZ8Z2RThZ9iWp3_yfi97blU3oo-DTGbIweZze4C0NX_Q256BgfeNlzCYIN4uiLZwMQvYArEF4GH229bPIQNyhsOocqIML24-ImuW-EM8UGJvK0/s320/IMG_7180.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Jeremy with Nanou's blanket</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
While the children coloured and cut out almost incessantly in the cabin, I spent my time with my head through the hatch, attempting to get some decent photographs. TheRev gave me a camera with a super zoom for my birthday last year, and I'm determined to make a well-photographed catalogue of Broads wildlife. <br />
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<br />
Unfortunately, all the Broads wildlife have got wind of this, and they operate a simple rule. If they can see the camera, they hide. Birdsong falls silent. Even the omnipresent seagulls go to their roosts. Whenever I am busy doing something essential inside the cabin, however - preventing the children from killing each other, for example, or lighting the gas to make a cup of tea - the skies suddenly fill with marsh harriers which swoop low over the roof of the boat. Seals and otters swim merrily alongside us. Grey herons and little egrets pose along the riverbank, flanked by curlews, oyster catchers and avocets. Reed warblers put on a concert. Kingfishers flash by. TheRev shouts, "There's a tern out here that has just caught a fish RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!"<br />
<br />
This is only the slightest of exaggerations.<br />
<br />
Also, TheRev takes a much better picture with my camera than I do. After all my poor efforts, he captured a marsh harrier hovering above a windmill in a single shot that encapsulates the Broads so well, it ought to be published. I won't share it here, because it hurts my pride.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIhmWHQHL1WDwvGkQAmjbHp7R4Ba-7t5VNdrtcW1E4E4onuYIEDlBGGmcQ9lTcs6tsXU64HWBe4gmcv0nj-5JfpcDfpyFWP1gAmtKgySiKBr1GNJ1XsPtyhQugVu9DeyygaDhrRXG6Yf8/s1600/IMG_7205.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIhmWHQHL1WDwvGkQAmjbHp7R4Ba-7t5VNdrtcW1E4E4onuYIEDlBGGmcQ9lTcs6tsXU64HWBe4gmcv0nj-5JfpcDfpyFWP1gAmtKgySiKBr1GNJ1XsPtyhQugVu9DeyygaDhrRXG6Yf8/s320/IMG_7205.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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We're all a bit sad to be back to school tomorrow. Roll on the summer holidays!</div>
</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-29952473707091763952017-05-10T06:33:00.000-07:002017-05-10T06:33:29.566-07:00Where have I been?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
This is one of those shamefaced blog posts. I don't know whether anyone really follows this blog any more, but if you do, then I apologise that I haven't written in it for eight months. Where have I been?<br />
<br />
I've been setting up a new, working-life blog for most of my writing, because bits of writing-related stuff here that I wanted to share more widely were getting muddled up with family-related posts that, while entertaining, were somewhat less professional and relevant. If you'd like to see or follow that new webpage and blog, it is here: <a href="https://amystorytellerblog.wordpress.com/">https://amystorytellerblog.wordpress.com/</a><br />
I've also become a regular on the ACW blog, every second of the month here: <a href="http://morethanwriters.blogspot.co.uk/">http://morethanwriters.blogspot.co.uk/</a><br />
<br />
I've been chasing after my children as they grow up far too fast, zooming through stages and phases before I've had a chance to document them properly.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo5mqiuK8cBqxQwuwYTG4B4vgo3AihtjtGkyOxgWmjQ-ZbmlFWAJczdR20h2Ll6L98ZUm99-_7Q0VAWR-8ZtoauTXcszH6l9wfKTOYML-_W-x0_PK9b_PJm5tVqXuZxHsnSQpF9WsOGiM/s1600/IMG_6382.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo5mqiuK8cBqxQwuwYTG4B4vgo3AihtjtGkyOxgWmjQ-ZbmlFWAJczdR20h2Ll6L98ZUm99-_7Q0VAWR-8ZtoauTXcszH6l9wfKTOYML-_W-x0_PK9b_PJm5tVqXuZxHsnSQpF9WsOGiM/s320/IMG_6382.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
Abigail is now in her final term of year 2. She continues to be the best seven-year-old storyteller I know, and she sings perfectly in tune, but only when she wants to and not if anyone else is joining in. She's just started to be interested in the sounds that different letters make, and in trying to write things down. She gets frustrated, as she only knows half the letters of the alphabet, but she'll get there. <br />
She has gone through some very deep iPad-related interests, especially Minecraft (at which point she was literally living in her very own world, and only those with compatible devices could visit her there) YouTube (wicked Mummy took it off all the screens in the house in the end) and, up to the present, some hideous game starring a small and overly cute panda bear which seems to download a new version of itself every time you complete a game, filling the iPad with the wretched things. However, at least some of them are genuinely educational, requiring basic letter and number knowledge. She's clearly learning from it, as despite not officially recognising numbers, she's worked out how to put my passcode in.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8_Eyo78DHDdW2Jdk141oI-65fhWwvWdMgt9rQkXPB7EkoQbdvab8dl1Eu1uQUYkfcK0Efu7FtBeEI4AYuChMs23HCADS-n1K4ETTUjNArU5D9AMZ3oUk-48rE4fbgbRmsD-zUCEceDWE/s1600/IMG_1546.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8_Eyo78DHDdW2Jdk141oI-65fhWwvWdMgt9rQkXPB7EkoQbdvab8dl1Eu1uQUYkfcK0Efu7FtBeEI4AYuChMs23HCADS-n1K4ETTUjNArU5D9AMZ3oUk-48rE4fbgbRmsD-zUCEceDWE/s320/IMG_1546.JPG" width="240" /></a>Jeremy is about to turn 5 and finish his reception year. He has asked for a Space-themed party, as he is now heading for NASA levels in knowledge of the solar system. I prefer this fascination to his previous Paw Patrol one, and we are currently redecorating his bedroom with stars, moons, planets and astronauts everywhere. For Christmas he was given the Playmobil rocket launchpad, which is the most complicated piece of kit I've ever seen, better suited for scientific demonstrations than playing. He took it off to Show and Tell and I think gave his classmates some sort of a lecture on how to blow up asteroids. <br />
Second only to space, his other love is anything that goes on a track. Yesterday, we counted his track-related toys after he asked for yet another one for his birthday. We found three train-related sets, two car-related sets and had a discussion about whether the marble run should count.<br />
<br />
As a family, we now have guinea pigs. We have guinea pigs in perpetuity, because apparently you have to replace the one that dies or the one that's left will pine away and follow it to the grave.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAdbypyVy_UafRdWWXak6J4-9wKNY7Hp5CIysl0mNYOQeWj1nPnNU7NwFQq5jItIKBJXDM57ZCZ1gpiw34ihzn81EC8oxicuJ5on2fxIlTrWHG4QDuGfGmBRmxCfXGL5ybSaYVl8Umqe0/s1600/IMG_1593.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAdbypyVy_UafRdWWXak6J4-9wKNY7Hp5CIysl0mNYOQeWj1nPnNU7NwFQq5jItIKBJXDM57ZCZ1gpiw34ihzn81EC8oxicuJ5on2fxIlTrWHG4QDuGfGmBRmxCfXGL5ybSaYVl8Umqe0/s200/IMG_1593.JPG" width="150" /></a></div>
<br />
I will start blogging about family life here again, now that I have put other things into other places. It just might not be as frequent as I'd like. I must do it for myself, because reading back over all these posts shows me how much I have already forgotten.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-46629382131805138802016-09-30T08:40:00.003-07:002016-09-30T08:40:57.699-07:00After school chat<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Today I had Jeremy to myself for a bit after school, as Abi was at the dentist with TheRev. I opened his book bag to see if he'd brought any homework back fr the weekend, and found a paper covered with lines of squiggles. (Note: Children's names have been changed in the following conversation. I don't *think* there is a Christine or a Davy in Jem's class, but if there are then I apologise to them. It wasn't them!)<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQy34-pgb27tjIC6gQUSJ4USOMOGhpoWNke3TuxFvTc1NmPwn_I6U3rvIYayFoRqBzF8URwZmYEZJHkvzQH2j5qcrGKIQ-17sf_FobbT5zB6j2eWFAC0Nfq26wAaxcEU0tJbeE-gG0Ok8/s1600/IMG_0427.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQy34-pgb27tjIC6gQUSJ4USOMOGhpoWNke3TuxFvTc1NmPwn_I6U3rvIYayFoRqBzF8URwZmYEZJHkvzQH2j5qcrGKIQ-17sf_FobbT5zB6j2eWFAC0Nfq26wAaxcEU0tJbeE-gG0Ok8/s320/IMG_0427.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The List</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
Me: Oh, this is good. You've done some writing today?<br />
<br />
Jem: I maked a list.<br />
<br />
Me: I see! A list of what?<br />
<br />
Jem: It's a list like Father Christmas. I putted Christine on the naughty list.<br />
<br />
Me: Oh...kaaaay...Who is on the good list?<br />
<br />
Jem: Everyone in the class except Christine.<br />
<br />
Me: Oh dear. What did Christine do to be put on the naughty list?!<br />
<br />
Jem: She stole mine and Davy's chicks.<br />
<br />
Me: Your chips? At lunchtime?<br />
<br />
Jem: No, CHICKS. They were having a bath, but she thought the cup we was using was not a bath so she took them and I putted her on the naughty list.<br />
<br />
Me: I see you've put yourself on this list, too.<br />
<br />
Jem: No. That's just so people know it's MY list.<br />
<br />
Me: Ah. Right.<br />
<br />
Jem: Did you know school has rules?<br />
<br />
Me: I expect it does, yes. What are the school rules?<br />
<br />
Jem: They're the same as our rules.<br />
<br />
Me: For example?<br />
<br />
Jem: No hitting and no kicking and no bubbling in your juice and everything. <br />
<br />
Me: Of course...<br />
<br />
Jem: But that's not how the school rules song goes. And at school there are more rules.<br />
<br />
Me: What's a school rule that isn't a rule we have at home?<br />
<br />
Jem: No lying down on the floor.<br />
<br />
He then asked to go round to a friend's house and disappeared. Apparently, having a schoolboy means I never get to see him. I hope he's forgiven Christine by Monday...<br />
<br /></div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-42378020488075774712016-05-16T05:20:00.001-07:002016-05-16T05:21:06.940-07:00To the young author who was worried by SATs<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Dear Young Author,<br />
<br />
I read about you on Michael Rosen's Facebook page, where I found a link to <a href="https://rhinoreads.wordpress.com/2016/05/14/writers-give-hope-to-future-author/" target="_blank">this article</a>. I read that you were worried, because you thought the kinds of questions that baffled you in the SATs tests might mean you had to give up on your dream of being an author. I was pleased to see that lots of authors have already responded on that page.<br />
<br />
Perhaps I'm too late, but here's my message to add to the others: I'm an author. I always knew I would be one, because I spent my childhood telling stories to my friends, my sister, my parents, my teddies and anyone else who would listen. <br />
<br />
My English teacher at school used to put ticks next to the bits he liked best in my stories. If there was one tick, it was something quite good. If there were two ticks, he was seriously impressed. Any more ticks than that, and he had probably done a victory lap of the room and opened a bottle of champagne before sitting down to continue marking. Once, I wrote quite a long story about a girl who had to run up a mountain and warn some people hiding in a cave that there were soldiers coming to get them. When he marked the story, my English teacher put THREE ticks next to the sentence 'Rocks, lots of rocks before the cave!'<br />
<br />
Now, I know what you're going to say, or at least I know what the person who set the SATs tests would probably say. That isn't a sentence - it hasn't got a verb in it. Also, it has an exclamation mark where there should have been a full stop. It uses the word 'rocks' twice when it could have used an interesting synonym, and it has no 'wow' words in it at all.<br />
<br />
The reason it got three ticks, my teacher said, was that taking the verb out and repeating the word 'rocks' gave the sentence a breathless, hurried, stumbling feeling, which helped him to imagine how the girl looked and felt as she raced up the mountain and was faced with climbing over loads of rocks when she was in such a hurry.<br />
<br />
My English teacher knew what he was talking about. Every now and then I still check over my writing for a 'three ticks' moment.<br />
<br />
There isn't actually an exam type of test that can test good writing. The only way to test good writing is to see whether people enjoy reading it. If you can write a story which makes people want to carry on reading it, which makes them worried about the character in it, or which makes them feel breathless or excited or happy or sad, or which makes them laugh until they cry, then the story has passed the test.<br />
<br />
It's never about YOU passing the test, by the way. If the story doesn't pass the test, it doesn't make YOU a bad writer. It just means that the story needs polishing, or that you could try writing a different story until you find one that works. I have notebooks full of stories that didn't quite pass the test, and I think every good writer probably does. Each one helped me to become a better writer, not a worse one, because that's what good testing should do - unlike the SATs.<br />
<br />
I look forward to reading one of your books one day.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-51639003465859625692016-05-06T05:08:00.000-07:002016-05-06T08:06:18.026-07:00The Traveller and the Wise Man<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>In which I tell stories in protest, and inadvertently answer a question about the role of imagination in storytelling.</i></span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-8ab38147-85f0-98a6-c686-49660d11309d" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This is a tale of two parts.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In the first part, I was recently at a retreat day led by Malcolm Guite. There was a discussion about imagination - Guite has written about theology and poetic imagination at length in his wonderful book </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Faith, Hope and Poetry,</i></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> which I finally finished reading in February - and at one point, he asked me to say something about the role of imagination in storytelling. Taken by surprise, I talked briefly about how, in storytelling, the audience does at least half of the imaginative work by creating the story visually in their own minds, which was true, but a little garbled and possibly not very relevant!</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<div style="line-height: 1.38;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In the second part of this tale, I was asked to do some storytelling on the 3rd May at an outdoor event for the Let Kids Be Kids campaign: children and parents who were protesting against the emphasis on SATS and testing in education by taking a day off school to do fun learning out of doors. I went along very gladly, because I agree wholeheartedly with the campaign and have been following the news about the SPAG tests with growing horror (have a look at Michael Rosen’s <a href="http://michaelrosenblog.blogspot.co.uk/" target="_blank">blog </a>for a good commentary on the whole thing).</span></div>
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: 14.6667px; line-height: 20.24px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.38; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.38; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWQBeuvHwt1zDKuBoxBuNbEFMKJKCVuJa-Z2Zp8K3B9ewHNUw8DH0RCJLmMFib5CFsylVD452EamXR7PM4RWtmGD6E6xH9mMIopx9hnlPBdzywuMNdz8vtZWx29lsYvJnqjrd02iN3dDE/s1600/13177606_10154268354161042_8867779605039295178_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWQBeuvHwt1zDKuBoxBuNbEFMKJKCVuJa-Z2Zp8K3B9ewHNUw8DH0RCJLmMFib5CFsylVD452EamXR7PM4RWtmGD6E6xH9mMIopx9hnlPBdzywuMNdz8vtZWx29lsYvJnqjrd02iN3dDE/s320/13177606_10154268354161042_8867779605039295178_n.jpg" width="302" /></a></span></div>
</div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I chose two stories to begin the session. The first was Peg Soup, a story which I have recently added to my repertoire: it’s a version of the well-known folktale in which a traveller claims to be able to make soup out of a peg, and so persuades previously poor or selfish people to add the few ingredients they have individually as ‘flavouring’ until a real soup has been made which everyone can share. The second story was one I’ve been telling for years, in which Ming Lo visits a wise man to ask him how to move a mountain, and the wise man responds with various ridiculous and ineffective methods before relenting and telling Ming Lo to ‘dance the dance of the moving mountain’, which turns out to involve walking backwards with his eyes shut. When he opens his eyes, the mountain is far away.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After telling both stories, I asked the children whether they’d noticed any similarities between them. This is usually a good way of opening up a general discussion about storytelling. What tends to happen is that a few tentative answers will focus on the method: “There were bits that repeated” “There was a rhyme” or “You did actions”, for example. As the children learn that there are not really any wrong answers, they become more confident and we can start talking about the stories themselves, at which point they might notice that both stories contained a trick, that they both contained people who believed that the impossible was happening. Then we could start to talk about what role the trick played in the story.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This time, however, one of the first answers came from a girl who confidently said the following: “Both the stories were about how if you think you can’t do something, or don’t have something, the answer is actually inside you all the time”.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was stunned, because it is very unusual to find a child - or an adult - who can leap straight to the heart of the message of a story like that, and I can only assume that she has been steeped in folktale since infancy to do it so instinctively!</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It was only when thinking about her surprising answer later on that I realised that the two stories perfectly answered the question about the role of imagination in storytelling. In fact, the traveller and the wise man both embody the role of imagination within their stories. Instead of giving an instant solution to the problems of the other characters - in fact, instead of pointing out that the things they want (a meal out of nothing, a mountain to move) are impossible, they both respond by imagining what would happen if the things </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">were </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">possible and teaching a lesson that way.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And this is precisely the kind of teaching which is hampered by the mindset of a Gove or a Morgan or a Gibb who thinks that learning must be rote and precise and testable, and that teaching must have a measured outcome. Neither the wise man nor the traveller point out that they have been teaching a lesson all along. They leave their pupils to work it out by themselves - and even if they never do, even if the trick is never revealed, the villagers will still get together to share their goods when they make ‘peg soup’, and Ming Lo will still know which dance to do when he is next faced with an immoveable object. The fact that they won’t know </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">how </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">they are achieving these impossible things won’t actually matter to them. They have learned something all the same.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Let’s have Lewis Carroll’s White Queen, who could believe in six impossible things before breakfast, for education secretary. It’s only by imagining how the impossible could happen that we can ever achieve it in real life.</span></div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-53382162160138006862016-01-12T06:49:00.002-08:002016-01-12T06:49:48.535-08:00Books I read in 2015<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Inspired by Sheridan Voysey and Amy Boucher Pye, last January I started keeping a list of every book I read in 2015. The results are almost too embarrassing to share, mainly because it looks to me as though I have done hardly any reading over the last twelve months. If you’ve just glanced down at the list and decided that I must be attempting some kind of humble-brag, you need to understand that before I had children, I used to read books more than most people eat. Reading was me. It was what I did. I couldn’t help it. And then I went to university, where it was quite a normal week’s workload to read two novels, and all the criticism that had been written about them, and another novel by the same author to get some context, and a couple of books that inspired or influenced the two novels, and then write an essay comparing them. So noticing that there were some months in 2015 in which I only read one short book shows me that me reading has a long way to go before it’s fully recovered from the impact of children! At least there are no blank months; and I seem to have mostly got over my bleary-eyed, sleep-deprived days of reading nothing but Asterix comics and Christian chick-lit intended for teenagers. Anyway, for anyone interested, here’s what I thought of what I read in 2015.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">January</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Labyrinth Year,</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> Mari Howard: (</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Written by an ACW friend. Here’s my review written at the time:) I’ve been waiting eagerly for this sequel to ‘Baby, Baby’, and enjoyed meeting all the characters again. The central theme of the labyrinth (and, crucially, how it is different to a maze) is woven cleverly through the whole, reflecting the twists and turns of the plot and leading to a particularly satisfying and thought-provoking ending.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Mari Howard’s skill as a storyteller is evident, for me, through the fact that the plot and the characters kept me turning the pages and hooked into the story, despite the fact that the writing style would not have been my personal choice: it’s dense writing, switching between characters, some told in first person and others in third, with lots of half-finished sentences and unconventional punctuation. There were also a few continuity errors due to the late 90s dating of the story - I’m fairly sure that nobody said ‘OMG’ before the turn of the millenium, and a film is mentioned that didn’t appear until 2002 - but again, these were small hiccups in a good story that was grippingly crafted to keep me on the edge of my seat.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">February</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Giver</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Lois Lowry</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - Lois Lowry was my favourite author as a pre-teen, and I read most of her books repeatedly until I had them nearly memorised. This one came out after I had ‘grown out of’ Lois Lowry, but it won lots of prizes and caused lots of controversy so I thought I’d give it a go. It was superb. I must read the rest of the trilogy.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">March</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Chasing Francis</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Ian Morgan Cron</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: I really enjoyed this scenic novel about a pastor encountering the life of St Francis. Both gripping and fascinating. It’s on my re-read list.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Losing Face</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Annie Try</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: Written by a fellow member of ACW, this was a great teen novel about the recovery, spiritual and physical, of a girl who is disfigured in an accident. It was written using formats such as texts and e-mails, giving it a very contemporary voice. Apparently a sequel is planned, which I will be looking out for.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">April</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Cactus Stabbers</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Jeff Lucas</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: In 2014 I read Jeff Lucas’s Faith in the Fog, which I thought was great, but I was rather disappointed by his writing in The Cactus Stabbers: it seemed unpolished and all a bit obvious. It was an OK light read for our boating holiday, though.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Faith, Hope and Poetry</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Malcolm Guite</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (started): This is going to take a while to finish, because I have to be awake to read it properly, and have my journal nearby to take copious notes! It is so good to be reading something properly academic, though, and so very inspiring. Like sitting down to a proper meal after years of living on crisps and coke.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">May</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Innocence of Father Brown</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, G K Chesterton</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - I now have an ambition to read everything Chesterton ever wrote, starting with more of these.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Never Mind the Reversing Ducks</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Adrian Plass</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (re-reading) This can’t really have been my first re-read of the year, can it? I probably didn’t count them unless I actually re-read the whole book cover to cover; but I generally have at least one Adrian Plass on the go, and I’ve read all them before.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">June</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Unseen Footprints</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Sheridan Voysey</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (Finished. Started sometime around Christmas and has been on hold!)</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">On This Day</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Melody Carlson</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (re-read) Ahhh, summer, the time for re-reading very light and undemanding books.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Adrian Plass: </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Cabbages for the King, Sacred Diary</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (several from the series) all re-reads!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">July</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">M is for Autism</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">:</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> a surprisingly short story (I bought it on Kindle and expected a novel) but very well-written, from the perspective of a teen girl newly diagnosed with autism. It was put together by the girls from a school featured on a documentary I watched, but now can’t remember what it was called.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Life You Never Expected</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Andrew and Rachel Wilson</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: I was really torn about this book, and may have to write more about it later. On the one hand it offered a good and helpful, gospel-centred perspective from parents of autistic children; and I thought that their central image of the orange was an excellent metaphor for having children with special needs, much better than the ‘Holland’ one which is shared around so much. On the other hand, they kept using the phrase “There will be no autism in heaven”, which I found very difficult from an autistic advocate point of view. Yes, I definitely need to write a longer post about this one at some stage.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Woman Who Went to Bed for a Year</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Sue Townsend</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: this was a super, entertaining, just-the-right-amount-of-thought-provoking, perfect summer read.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">CS Lewis: </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Broadcast Talks</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: Always good to read a bit of CS Lewis. Should do it much more often.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">(Most of) </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">God Knows</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Joseph Heller</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: a really fascinating novel, using storytelling to explore the life of King David. It made me go back and check the original frequently! We were looking at the story of David in church at the time as well, so this offered a useful perspective. I didn’t read it all the way through, though; I ended up dipping in to look for certain episodes, which I’m sure spoiled the effect of the novel. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">August</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Elements of Eloquence</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Mark Forsyth</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: Brilliant. I took writing tips from it. I should have written them down.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Unknown Unknown</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Mark Forsyth</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: An essay, really, but if it calls itself a book on Kindle then it counts, right?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Storytelling booklets</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> for Abimbola Gbemi Alao</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - We really enjoyed meeting this great storyteller at the Buckfast Abbey storytelling festival, so I was pleased to be asked to read her booklets and write some recommendations for them. I bought her novel, too (see September)</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Twelve Curious Deaths in France</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, John Goldsmith:</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> A very enjoyable book of short stories, ranging from amusing to horrifying, which does exactly what it says in the title. The quasi-factual nature of some of the stories meant that I spent about half an hour Googling after each chapter, trying to tease out fact from fiction. I suspect the author of having created a Wikipedia page. Highly recommended.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">September</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Minding Frankie</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Maeve Binchy</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: Having mainly enjoyed short stories by Maeve Binchy, I hadn’t realised how tired her writing style gets after a while. It was a good story, but about half way through I stopped focusing on the plot and started counting the number of times she wrote that a character “took no prisoners” just before they started talking.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Legendary Weaver</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Abimbola Gbemi Alao</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: An interesting coming-of-age novel, combining a culture of storytelling and its stories with the experience of a young girl struck deaf through illness.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Finding Myself in Britain</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Amy Boucher Pye:</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> I loved this book, and have already reviewed it <a href="http://therevsfamily.blogspot.co.uk/2015/10/finding-myself-in-britain-book-review.html" target="_blank">here.</a></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">October</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Resilient</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Sheridan Voysey:</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> It was exciting to be part of Sheridan’s ‘launch team’, and gave me plenty of ideas about launching my own books! I started reading this in early September, so it took me a while, mainly because I had to be properly awake to digest it. My review is <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/review/R2LD23B0XIOUM7/ref=cm_cr_dp_title?ie=UTF8&ASIN=1627073566&channel=detail-glance&nodeID=266239&store=books" target="_blank">here.</a></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Girl Alone</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Cathy Glass:</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> I used to read lots of Cathy Glass’s tales of fostering children, so I automatically bought this one when I saw it on offer. It reminded me that I wanted to read the one about the daughter she eventually adopted, so I bought </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Will You Love Me</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> on Kindle and read that one, too. They are very quick reads, partly because they are written in a fairly simple and formulaic way, and partly because you don’t want to put them down before getting to the happy ending.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">November</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">All Questions Great and Small</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Adrian Plass and Jeff Lucas</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: eagerly awaited NEW Adrian Plass! I zoomed through it in an hour like a child opening all their Christmas presents at once, and now need to re-read it more slowly to discover what it actually said.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Fit to burst,</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> Rachel Jankovic</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: (For the tenth or so time) I ought to read this once a month, really, not once a year. Best book for Christian mothers - I started highlighting memorable passages in my Kindle copy, but I was effectively just turning the whole thing yellow.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">December</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Waiting on the Word</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, Malcolm Guite</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: These were devotionals that went on until Epiphany, so I really finished it in January, but I’m letting it squeeze in since it was an Advent book. It was wonderful. It did me so much good to read a poem every day. I need to find ways to carry it on, and I can’t wait for Lent so that I can start </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Word in the Wilderness</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Various Christmas books</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">: I tend to spend December re-reading things from our Christmas books box: collections of stories, treasuries, Maeve Binchy’s This Year Will Be Different and Adrian Plass’s And Jesus Will Be Born. </span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And now I need to find something more serious to get my teeth into before the January 2016 entry ends up with no books listed in it.</span></div>
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A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-47359937022019172892015-10-16T06:25:00.000-07:002015-10-16T06:25:08.414-07:00The Duplo Train<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Listening to five minutes of Jeremy's playing with his Duplo train set is like entering a surreal universe.<br />
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A train gets stuck on a country track. It has broken down. Oh no! What will the passengers do? They'll never get to the station! They must find a train driver, because drivers are good at fixing trains.<br />
<br />
Thank goodness! A train driver has been found in one of the carriages (quite who has been driving the train up until this point remains a mystery). He knows all about trains. He volunteers to have a look, steps down from the carriage and approaches the engine, where he tinkers with something on the side for a bit. He says it needs oil, and he has some in his truck, but his truck is nowhere to be seen. <br />
<br />
He's a clever train driver, though, and he thinks outside the box and walks to a nearby farm, where he asks the farmer: "Please can I borrow one of your animals?"<br />
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"Oh, yes!" says the farmer enthusiastically, and offers a brown cow. The train driver leads the cow back to the stranded train and walks it around the engine once. Then he takes it back to the farmer and thanks him.<br />
<br />
("What did he need the cow for, Jeremy?"<br />
"To fix the train."<br />
"Yes, but what did the cow do to fix the train?"<br />
"It mooooed.")<br />
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All right then. Back to the engine. The driver returns to his carriage and waits expectantly in his passenger seat. Oh dear, it's still not moving! Off the driver goes to the farm again.<br />
<br />
"Please may I borrow your goat?"<br />
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The goat is the charm, and the passengers are on their way to sounds of cheering.<br />
<br />
There still doesn't appear to be anybody actually driving the train.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-32040010310233924882015-10-06T05:17:00.001-07:002015-10-06T05:17:59.649-07:00Finding Myself in Britain (Book Review)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsKToLS07wkw2Qp5eCr1JBCef77oBU8LJP1lvgCgw_JxInrYYnJmczkqZqeEWAy8N6ef4Zs7XmGwqUKxWwbLy_leiWLv9FFjSKXElFBOzuqlf27ZoqJJuI483Y8ehVdV6c16pXGC7RIlU/s1600/12075052_10101453138690580_983512826593439371_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsKToLS07wkw2Qp5eCr1JBCef77oBU8LJP1lvgCgw_JxInrYYnJmczkqZqeEWAy8N6ef4Zs7XmGwqUKxWwbLy_leiWLv9FFjSKXElFBOzuqlf27ZoqJJuI483Y8ehVdV6c16pXGC7RIlU/s320/12075052_10101453138690580_983512826593439371_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It was so appropriate that, to read the final chapter of this particular book, I settled down in the Rectory garden with a cup of tea, escaping the noise of a workman ripping out our bathroom upstairs. After all, in the previous chapters, Amy Boucher Pye had written entertainingly about the British obsession with tea (and giving tea to workmen), life in a vicarage, and in particular the plumbing! I’d laughed at her description of a typical vicarage shower “like an Irish mist, in which one would need to jump around in order to get wet” and cheered her on as she confessed to leaving a trail of power showers in all her dwellings - I’m sure there are several vicars’ families who bless her daily for that.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Amy’s story of finding herself in Britain - not only transplanted from her American home and culture, but also married to an Anglican priest with all of the culture shock that can entail - is full of humour, faith and insight, not to mention facts about America I never knew, and facts about how the two nations experience each other that should be essential reading for anyone planning to cross the Atlantic. She compares her life’s journey, her being in the right place while still longing for home, to the experience of any Christian, outlined in Hebrews*: living as foreigners on the earth and seeking the city to come. And of course, “Finding Myself in Britain” is a particularly clever title as Amy begins to work out a new way of life and a way to root the identities of herself and her children. </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I loved the way that Amy structured the book on the different seasons of the church year, being an inveterate season-dweller myself: I compared notes, took tips and ideas, and raised an eyebrow at the strange order of her Advent wreath candles. I so enjoyed being a fly on the wall for fasts and feasts and family times.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There was a 'notes' section at the back to explain Ameracinisms to the British readers and vice versa, which was often worth flipping to for the amusing definitions even if I reckoned I knew the word. The only slightly distracting thing was the constant and apparently random use of italicised phrases - I think they were meant as asides to the reader, though they would often have fitted perfectly well into the text - but perhaps that's just another cultural difference, and a way of the author's voice coming through loud and clear.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Amy was full of valuable advice, too, which was woven cunningly into her story and emerged to catch my breath when I was least expecting it. I’ve written down some of what she had to say about identity and being a vicar’s wife and stuck it above my desk. And there were poems and anecdotes and even a recipe section at the back. What was this book? A memoir? A devotional? A how-to-live-in-a-vicarage manual?</span></div>
<span id="docs-internal-guid-e485bc05-3cff-efc6-2852-dcf64740cb01"></span><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Whatever it was, I didn’t actually want to read the final chapter as I sat there in the garden. Closing the book was like having to say goodbye to a friend after a week’s holiday together. Thankfully, though, you can always turn back to page 1 of a book and start again. And then there’s all those recipes to try.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: 14.6667px; line-height: 20.24px;">* Hebrews 11 verses 13-14 and 13 verse 14</span></span></div>
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A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-83590255974801583072015-08-07T14:32:00.001-07:002015-08-07T14:32:20.886-07:00The Muffin Queen<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<b>TheRev:</b> I'd quite like a muffin.<br />
<b>Me</b>: Oh, we don't have any. But we do have crumpets. I'd quite like a crumpet.<br />
<b>TheRev</b>: They're the same thing. Some people call crumpets, muffins.<br />
<b>Me</b>: Nonsense. Crumpets and muffins are completely different.<br />
<b>TheRev</b>: Well, I'd still like a muffin.<br />
<b>Me</b>: Sorry, we don't have any, but would you like a crumpet?<br />
<b>TheRev</b>: I can call them muffins if I like.<br />
<b>Me</b>: Look, there are two different things that a muffin could mean, and neither of them is a crumpet.<br />
<b>TheRev</b>: Who died and made you Muffin Queen?<br />
<b>Me</b>: (Gingerbread Man voice from <i>Shrek</i>:) The muffin queeeen?!<br />
*Giggling*</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-2280278229020622872015-07-09T08:46:00.000-07:002015-07-09T08:46:03.838-07:00A very handsome nose<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Abigail draws a long line of little shapeless figures, and gives each of them a smile and one dot. "That's you...and Aunty Madeleine...and Aunty Katy...and Aunty Lili..."<br />
"Why do we all only have one eye?" I ask.<br />
"The others are on the other side."<br />
Then, just I'm marvelling that she's worked out perspective, she goes back along the line adding a second dot to each face.<br />
"Oh, no, Abi!" - I'm cursing myself for interfering - "Don't put the other eyes in - you were quite right that they should be on the other side!"<br />
She blinks at the drawing dispassionately. "No, those are the noses."<br />
Thank heaven.<br />
"Aunty Madeleine has a very handsome nose," she says as she adds it.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-31584270974975290252015-04-19T10:55:00.002-07:002015-04-19T10:55:27.883-07:00Lots of naughty<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Here's a tiny drama from this morning.<br />
<br />
The scene: It's Sunday morning. Abigail has got up early, refused anything resembling breakfast and eventually agreed to eat her untouched school packed lunch from the fridge. Mummy has left her with this and CBeebies, made herself a cup of tea and gone upstairs to sort things out. Jeremy has pottered down to watch CBeebies, and TheRev is in the study, printing stuff.<br />
<br />
<i>Mummy comes back down the stairs to find Abi waiting at the bottom.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>:<i> (With relish) </i>Mummy! I beened lots of naughty.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Uh oh.<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: But, I want to be friends.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Okay. Well, what did you do?<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: I eated my spoon.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Sorry. You ate your what?<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: My spoon.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Your - I - I'm not sure I've understood. You ate a spoon?<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: Can we be friends?<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: A spoon? Are you sure?<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: Yes.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Can you show me?<br />
<br />
<i>Abi leads Mummy to the sitting room and points to the remains of her packed lunch. The plastic baby spoon which was with the (unopened) yoghurt now only has half a spoon on the handle.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: You ATE a SPOON? But how...why...I mean, the other bit must be somewhere! Did you swallow it?<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: Are we friends?<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Yes but where's the SPOON? Is it in your tummy?<br />
<br />
<b>Abi</b>: I don't know. I spitted it out.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Then why can't I see it anywhere?<br />
<br />
<b>Jem</b>: Abi putted cheese on mine train. <br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: Oh. Yes, I can see that, but - Jem, did you see her eat a spoon?<br />
<br />
<b>Jem</b>: *proffering train* Clean it!<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: I can't really...here, have a wipe...Daddy, come in here, I think Abi has actually eaten a spoon!<br />
<br />
<b>Daddy</b>: I'm coming! That's just printing, I can help get the kids dressed.<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: They are already dressed. The issue here is that one of them has eaten a spoon.<br />
<br />
<i>There follows a time of panic as we both hunt for the other bit of the spoon and consider the idea that our food phobic daughter has managed to consume a sharp bit of plastic for breakfast</i><br />
<br />
<b>Daddy</b>: It's really gone!<br />
<br />
<b>Mummy</b>: What's that in...Jeremy's hair! It's in his hair!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, that funny green thing in Jem's hair was really the top of the spoon, affixed with cream cheese.<br />
<br />
It is a miracle every Sunday that we get to church on time.<br />
<br /></div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-62170569093403601642015-02-17T09:24:00.000-08:002015-02-17T09:24:53.937-08:0040 days, 40 acts, 40 bags<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
For Lent this year, I've signed up to two schemes: <a href="http://www.40acts.org.uk/" target="_blank">40 Acts</a> and <a href="http://www.whitehouseblackshutters.com/40-bags-in-40-days-2015/" target="_blank">40 bags in 40 days</a> Hopefully, I'm going to blog abut my experiences with these, but not every day (and, if I'm honest, probably not every week, since I'm writing a book and have two small children!)<br />
<br />
40 Acts will e-mail me a choice of three acts of generosity to perform every day. I'm both excited and nervous about this, because I suspect that many of them will require me to step outside my comfort zone in terms of time, money and being brave enough to talk to strangers. However, I love the idea of making Lent, not just about sacrifice for the sake of sacrifice, but about practicing a generous lifestyle.<br />
<br />
40 bags in 40 days is much more selfish: although I'm doing it partly because giving away lots of stuff and simplifying life fits in with the generous lifestyle, it's mainly because my house is a mess and I want to declutter like a crazy woman. The website suggests listing forty areas of the house or subsets of clutter (eg 'books') and tackling one each day, so I've listed my forty areas below, just for my own reference. The resulting 'bags' could be things to give away, bags for the trash (most likely) or things to upcycle and bring back into current use. I'm also going to count things boxed up for storage in the attic or garage. I won't necessarily do the areas in this order - some are bigger or smaller jobs so I can pick according to the time I have that day. And, in proper Lenten fashion, I get Sundays off!<br />
<br />
While I'm following 40 acts and 40 bags, I'm also going to resist the temptation to buy anything new in the way of clothes and toys (with a couple of exceptions, because Abi's obsessions and need for motivators know no Lent). This may be the hardest part of the whole thing.<br />
<br />
So, I'm simultaneously simplifying life and practicing generosity. It's like poetry: somebody said (I thought it was Tom Stoppard, but Google can't agree on who it was) that poetry is the simultaneous compression of form and expansion of meaning. Lent has always been about the compression of physical desires and the simultaneous expansion of spiritual gain, so that seems about right, really.<br />
<br />
<b>Forty Areas</b><br />
1) Under Abi's bed and down the back of her bedside cabinet<br />
2) Abi's desk and desk drawers (which are still mainly full of my own stuff)<br />
3) The vegetable rack in the bathroom where we keep dead shampoo bottles<br />
4) My bedside cabinet<br />
5) My wardrobe<br />
6) My chest of drawers (Oh, the socks. All the single socks. Sob.)<br />
7) TheRev's clothes<br />
8) The bathroom windowsill<br />
9)The bath toys<br />
10) The clean laundry pile (Ha! This will take about a week)<br />
11) Jeremy's toys<br />
12) Jeremy's clothes<br />
13) Abi's clothes<br />
14) The cloth nappies<br />
15) My desk<br />
16) My study shelves<br />
17) Kitchen windowsill<br />
18) Kitchen cupboards (crockery and glass)<br />
19) Kitchen cupboards (food)<br />
20) The den/puppet theatre in the understairs cupboard<br />
21) DVDs<br />
22) CDs<br />
23) Downstairs books<br />
24) Upstairs books<br />
25) The spare room<br />
26) On top of the fridge<br />
27) The ironing-board-and-junk cupboard<br />
28) Under the sink (about a million plastic bags)<br />
29) Abi's toys<br />
30) Abi's windowsill<br />
31) The downstairs educational toy and puzzle shelves<br />
32) The play kitchen area<br />
33) The downstairs toy box (I have no idea what's in it)<br />
34) Craft cupboard<br />
35) Under my desk<br />
36) TheRev's study shelves<br />
37) TheRev's study floor<br />
38) The sitting room<br />
39) Storytelling resources<br />
40) Utility/laundry/guinea pig stuff corner<br />
<br />
If I'm feeling especially brave, I may blog before-and-after pics of some of these, if only to banish the temptation to show off the tidy parts of life on social media while hiding the ugly ones. If anyone wants to join me in an honest sharing of mess and celebration of finding the carpet, make your own list and let me know and we'll get through this together...</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-65130531991701532332014-12-13T06:20:00.001-08:002014-12-13T06:20:55.336-08:00Abigail's Nativity<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
For this post, I would like to hand you over to my daughter, who is going to dictate the story of the nativity in her own words.<br />
<br />
"The angel said: 'You're going to have a baby!' and then Mary was surprised and then the angel just went away and then Mary shouted 'Joseph Joseph, the angel said I'm going to have a baby in my tummy!'<br />
<br />
And then Joseph said, 'Let's go to Bethlehem' but she said, 'No, it's a very long way away', but then they just goed and then the keeper...the inner...said, 'There's no more room!' Then they found a baby, Jesus. They found baby Jesus. And then the wise men comed...<br />
<br />
<i>(Here, there was a brief pause in which I reminded her about the shepherds)</i><br />
<br />
And then the angel said 'Don't be afraid, I got news for you' and then the shepherds went to find the baby and they got there and Mary said 'Look, the angel said I was going to have a baby in my tummy' and then the shepherds saw baby Jesus.<br />
<br />
THEN the wise men comed. And they brought applenut squash."<br />
<br />
<i>(Editor's note: I have no idea what applenut squash is, but it sounds delicious and suitably exotic.)</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
Pictured: the set of nativity puppets that we made to help tell the story, and a crib scene that Abigail made out of Sticklebricks.<br />
<br />
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A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-29726888726739080062014-11-17T13:28:00.000-08:002014-11-17T13:28:52.364-08:00All that glitters<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
An Abigail moment I want to record before I forget it.<br />
<br />
Abi often asks what inanimate objects are saying. I'm not always sure what she's getting at. Sometimes she wants to know their purpose, other times I think she is double checking that they really are inanimate objects and are not about to bite her or want a conversation.<br />
<br />
At this time of year, she also likes looking through Christmas catalogues with me, which is why she found this glittery reindeer and asked me what it was saying.<br />
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<br />
As ever, I had to improvise, and guessed that it might be saying "Glitter, glitter, I'm so pretty!"<br />
<br />
She fixed me with that Abigail-knows-the-answers-to-the-universe look. <br />
<br />
"No, Mummy. It saying "Glitter glitter, buy me if you got money!"<br />
<br />
Good to know that she's got the hang of consumerism. </div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-16431371115710651092014-07-23T03:11:00.000-07:002014-07-23T03:55:36.623-07:00I Love You...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It's our ninth wedding anniversary! Last night, we had a rare night out to the Apex in Bury St Edmunds, to listen to a fantastic band playing "Django a la Creole". They were epically talented whenever they picked up their instruments, but the lead clarinet kept trying to talk to us in between songs, which he did in a sort of incomprehensible croonmumble into the microphone. As he announced their encore at the end of the night, I was absolutely sure that he had said the next song, a Nat King Cole standard, would be called "I Love You For Several Mental Reasons". Was quite disappointed when it turned out to be 'sentimental'.<br />
<br />
Still, on our anniversary, here are several mental reasons why I love TheRev:<br />
<br />
He includes me in his eclectic tastes in music, even though I am still not sure what 'Creole' means musically.<br />
<br />
He finances my self-employed career that is at times merely a glorified hobby, encourages me in it as a ministry and proudly tells other people what I do for 'work'.<br />
<br />
When he makes me a slice of toast, it always has a bite taken out of one corner. He calls this 'tax'.<br />
<br />
When I'm about to knock the children's heads together, he takes them away and tickles them.<br />
<br />
He knows all the jokes and scripts from <i>What's Up Doc</i>, even though he doesn't particularly like the film.<br />
<br />
He is willing to sing important conversations to the tune of Thomas the Tank Engine so that we can continue our discussions on car journeys.<br />
<br />
No task is ever more urgent than answering a question I have about eschatology.<br />
<br />
He agrees to boycott Nestle because I say so, but then forgets and buys me mint Aero because he knows it's always been my favourite chocolate bar.<br />
<br />
When I make a deep philosophical comment about the worth of art once disconnected from its artist, he knows exactly what I mean and launches into his quite considerable thinking on the matter.<br />
<br />
While at university, he was saving up cash in a biscuit tin under his bed to buy my engagement ring.<br />
<br />
Over the course of our marriage he has, for the sake of our relationship, my sanity or the sheer fun of it, appeared on stage acting, singing and doing a dance with a chicken move. He has allowed me to stage slap him with a beach bag. He has learned to play the musical saw. He has become a ventriloquist dummy to entertain dinner companions. He has learned to ride a tandem. He has learned to change a cloth nappy. He has driven a VW camper van. He has driven the length and breadth of France several times. He has memorised all the words to <i>You're the Top</i> and <i>Baby, it's Cold Outside</i>.<br />
<br />
He is, in short, wonderful, and I love him for far more than several reasons, some mental, some sentimental. Happy anniversary, dearling.<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-52135837485854783052014-07-02T09:32:00.000-07:002014-07-02T09:32:09.247-07:00It's a wonder I'm not mad already<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Here's a little snapshot of communication in our house at the moment.<br />
<br />
I have failed to realise that TheRev is out for dinner tonight, and have planned a complicated salmon dish involving asparagus. Fairly certain that neither child would eat it anyway, I decide to ask their opinions and seek an excuse to cook a simpler supper for the three of us.<br />
<br />
I approach Abigail. This has to be done with caution, as she is absorbed in Pocoyo. My iPad has been thrown across the room for lesser intrusions.<br />
<br />
"Abi, would you like cheesy tomato pasta for dinner later, or salmon?"<br />
<br />
"I would like a sandwich."<br />
<br />
I glance at the screen. Pocoyo has a sandwich.<br />
<br />
"Right, but for dinner - pasta or salmon?"<br />
<br />
"Pasta AND salmon."<br />
<br />
"Do you like pasta?"<br />
<br />
"No."<br />
<br />
"Do you like salmon?"<br />
<br />
"No."<br />
<br />
I give up and go to find Jeremy. I find him about to lob all the loo rolls down the stairs. I rescue them.<br />
<br />
"Jem, do you want cheesy tomato pasta or salmon for dinner?"<br />
<br />
"Cheesy'matosammun. Yes."<br />
<br />
I really am looking forward to the day when I might be able to have a basic conversation with my children. It can't be that far off...can it?!</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-54851874766576854132014-05-21T13:30:00.000-07:002014-05-21T13:30:08.517-07:0020 Reasons Jeremy Couldn't Sleep<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Tonight I missed housegroup, one of my only sources of adult conversation, because Jeremy wouldn't go to sleep. Here are the reasons why, in his own words:<br />
<br />
Reasons 1-10: Losta bankit, Mummy! <i>('Lost' wasn't entirely accurate, though, as he was flinging it over the side of the cot).</i><br />
<br />
Reason 11: Bag gone. <i>(Yes, he had somehow managed to remove his sleeping bag and was standing up with it around his ankles.)</i><br />
<br />
Reason 12: Wockin chair peeease. <i>(So we rocked for a bit)</i><br />
<br />
Reason 13: Help! <i> (He had tried to remove the bag again, but got stuck with one foot through an arm hole having not succeeded in undoing the poppers)</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
Reason 14: Abi! Want a Abi!<i> (Abi has gone to sleep, why don't you go there too and find her?)</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
Reason 15: Losta bankit.<br />
<br />
Reason 16: Wockin chair 'gain.<br />
<br />
Reason 17: Brief tickle fight. <i>(The only alternative to throwing him out of the window.)</i><br />
<br />
Reason 18: Singa song Mummy.<br />
<br />
Reason 19: Not at song. Nother song.<br />
<br />
Reason 20: No 'leep.<br />
<br />
Finally got downstairs to make myself my first cup of tea of the day. Kettle boiled just as housegroup finished.<br />
<br />
Cheesed off.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-42562529348087384222014-05-18T15:25:00.000-07:002014-05-18T15:25:27.833-07:00That's what it's all about<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Last week, we received Abigail's 'Learning Journey' home from nursery. This brilliant book allows us to be flies on the wall of her classroom over her time there: it contains photos, worksheets, artwork and milestones, all surrounded by comments from her key worker and other teachers and helpers who observed her.<br />
<br />
Some of the reports are lovely to read, like the key worker's comment: "It is a pleasure to work with Abigail. She can always make me smile."<br />
<br />
Some of them are spot-on descriptions of her character: "Abigail knows her own mind and can make her own choices about what she wants to do and how she wants to do it. Abigail still needs some support with colour and shape recognition, however I believe Abigail knows more than she lets on". <br />
<br />
I enjoyed all the references to Abigail's love of books, especially the one that said "Given the choice, she would rather read a book" (sounds just like me!) and the form that listed 'Interests' as simply 'Books'.<br />
<br />
It was a treat to see all the photographs of Abi engaged with her peers in various activities. Once again, my girl is definitely recognisable: spinning around in a corner (with the other children all sitting neatly in a circle at the edge of the shot); dressing up in a princess dress and a bright blue wig; completely absorbed in creating a line of toy vehicles; and two pictures in which she inexplicably has a large amount of play doh sticking to her face. There are also pictures of her doing puzzles and sorting activities with lots of solemn concentration, and great shots of grins and giggles with other children.<br />
<br />
My very favourite, however, the cream of all the comments and the truest-to-life description of my wonderful daughter, was on the back of a worksheet on which Abigail had traced over dots to write the number 4 multiple times. The comment on the back tells me exactly which fingers she was using to hold her pencil, what she said all the colours were, how much support she needed, how well she understood the task and how long she kept at it before she lost interest in it, but none of that matters. At the bottom of the comments is written the one I want to frame and keep for ever:<br />
<br />
"The whole time Abigail was doing this sheet, she was singing the Hokey Cokey."<br />
<br />
Love her.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-20024059890835523632014-04-30T05:39:00.000-07:002014-04-30T05:39:16.804-07:00The Rev's Family Expressions of PosAutivity: #AutismPositivity2014<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I'm taking part in the 2014 Flash Blog of Autism Positivity.<br />
<br />
This is, as it says on the tin, a day at the end of a month of "autism awareness" (which, though well-meant, can very often spread depressing and downright damaging views of autism) when hundreds of bloggers come together to write positively about autism and autistic people.<br />
<br />
This year's theme is communication: "<strong style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">This year we hope to highlight the importance of flexibility in communication within our diverse community and honour multiple forms of personal expression" (official guidelines)</strong><br />
<strong style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></strong>
<strong style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">*****</strong><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPofUGeBjccBWMjznquRlp5i12ooglRo_RYHtD3dmYexs25dl2LFzRvb0_dlEYkV_9QYvBcStLCOVGFBxw_P2bLlWu643aBz1yHeuCfAlW1UNRNHqP_R-yQ-nn0DOFWcEmxx8iVMMW4lA/s1600/1012919_10152351323907941_1916691869_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPofUGeBjccBWMjznquRlp5i12ooglRo_RYHtD3dmYexs25dl2LFzRvb0_dlEYkV_9QYvBcStLCOVGFBxw_P2bLlWu643aBz1yHeuCfAlW1UNRNHqP_R-yQ-nn0DOFWcEmxx8iVMMW4lA/s1600/1012919_10152351323907941_1916691869_n.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
<strong style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></strong>
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Language is not Abigail's first language. She is doing ever so well at it, but it doesn't come naturally. She speaks, as TheRev puts it, like somebody using a phrase book: echoes from television, bedtime stories and overheard conversation are all stored in her extraordinary library of a mind, where they are broken down, mixed up and carefully chosen for use in every conversation. She takes comfort in scripts and songs which are the same every time.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">She started to learn language in echoes of full sentences and phrases. If she's learned that a phrase is an acceptable answer to a question (because it was true the first time) then it becomes the answer to that question every time: for a while, the answer to the question "Why is s/he crying" was always "Because my hitted him" even if it was a character in a book! Sometimes, a word selection accidentally triggers an echo, meaning that her reply to your question isn't at all what she meant to say. Sometimes she accidentally does it to herself: "I'm going to turn the page" she announced to me, before turning off the light.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The way she listens and speaks may make communication difficult sometimes, but at other times it's like living with a tiny unintentional poet, a walking box of connections and combinations all sparking and hissing and flashing at once.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Rather than try to describe it any further, I'm going to make a list of quotations from my journal that will hopefully give you some idea, both of how incredibly quickly she's learning, and of the amazing things that can by done with words by a child for whom language is not her first language.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">30/05/13</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Tiffer says, in conversation, that he thinks something is less important. Abi shouts: "It's not less important, it's FULL OF PORRIDGE!"</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">2/10/13 Abi's response to being asked what she did at nursery today: "I just played happily. Then I done a song about the sleeping butterflies. I think butterflies do sleep on something, it's just a pillow and a blanket and all the way back to bed, and then they go in a wirrelbarrel all the way home".</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">15/10/13</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">"I have an idea, how about we can play instead? It's playtime, that why we can play, and the time is play." (Actually, it was bedtime!)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">29/10/13</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Abi's response to my reaction upon discovering that she had drawn in orange highlighter on our hosts' pillowcase: "Don't worry Mummy. It's not the matter. It's GREAT!"</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, 'Bitstream Charter', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">25/11/13</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Me: Abi, we need to change your trousers, those are too small.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Her: No, those are too fine, they are just my same.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">25/01/14</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Abi is very interested that I am eating chocolate. "Have you beened a GOOD Mummy?"</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">11/02/14</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Me: What does an angel say, Abi? <i>(This is a script that we've been doing together since before Christmas, and the answer has always been "Don't be afraid, I've got good news for you", which comes from a favourite Christmas song on video).</i></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Her: Don't be afraid. I got something in my pocket to good news you. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">19/03/14</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Mummy, are you feeling better, or are you properly poorly?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">1/04/14</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Me: Abi, please put that magazine into my bag now.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;">Her: No, I won't do that. Putting in bags is not good for magazines.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Bitstream Charter, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 23.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span></div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-19630341289936817152014-01-05T15:54:00.000-08:002014-01-05T15:54:14.960-08:00Epiphany notes to self<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It has become something of an Epiphany tradition, as we pack up the decorations, to leave little notes among them for us to find next year. The notes we found as we unpacked the boxes this year included a copy of the new song we'd learned for the Advent wreath, a card by Abigail with a description of how she had made it and a note from me to future me which simply said, "Roll up your sleeves - the madness is about to begin!" Finding them was special and we will definitely be doing the same again this year; in a similar spirit, I've decided to write a blog post addressed to my future self, just rolling up her sleeves for Advent 2014.<br />
<br />
Dear Amy,<br />
You may remember 2013 as the year when presents were remarkably organised. This is because you went online in October and ordered most of Amazon. You also went to jumble sales from the summer onwards and had a hiding place for potential stocking presents. I applaud you - do that again. One way you could improve on 2013's performance is to use the extra time that your stunning gift prowess gives you to send some cards before the final posting date.<br />
You may also remember Christmas 2013 as a somewhat frustrating one. The first Christmas after Abi's diagnosis of autism, you tried to do everything "normal" despite having long since abandoned "normal" in your everyday life, and then despaired when it didn't work. There were some extra lovely moments too, though, and I hope you remember those: her word-perfect knowledge of all the Christmas songs she did at nursery (even though she didn't sing them on the stage), her serious face as she decorated the tree almost single-handed, the way that Baby Jesus was always 'poorly' for some unknown reason and that the stable was a 'farm' for the first few weeks of Advent, but did eventually become a stable when "Mary and Jophiss and the poorly poorly baby" moved in.<br />
For this 6th January, I've written 6 tips to get you through next year more smoothly. I hope you don't mind. Of course, knowing Abi and the way that she learns, you're probably not going to need a single one of these tips next year - she'll have the whole Christmas thing in her stride by then, I'm sure. Here they are just in case. You've found blogs by people on similar journeys very useful over the past year; if you don't need this list, perhaps somebody else will.<br />
<br />
1) I know you're Mrs Advent and you've been waiting several decades to inflict 586 different traditions on your children. It's unmanageable and overwhelming for any small child. Get a grip. Until they are older, pick one Advent tradition - Jesse tree, calendar or figures in the stable - and stick to it. Put it somewhere out of reach and make time to do it at the same time every day. This way you may actually end up with an enjoyable, meaningful routine which they remember. Also, you will stay sane and avoid spending your evenings replacing 22 little figures behind fiddly doors. <br />
<br />
2) At the time of writing, Abi has not yet grasped that between saying "Juice please" and drinking juice, there must be a time when Mummy goes to fetch the juice. Waiting is hard. 24 days of waiting is not even comprehensible. But 24 days of waiting when you have no idea what you're waiting for?! Everything you tried to talk about this year resulted in her either wanting or not wanting it, vehemently and IMMEDIATELY. Leave the Christmas talk until the last few days of Advent, because it risks building up into anxiety rather than anticipation. She'll go through it all in school anyway. Once the holidays have begun, why not prepare for Christmas 2014 by watching home videos of Christmas 2013? They're probably more realistic and informative than Charlie and Lola.<br />
<br />
3) Leave any family festive outings until after the 25th. Poor Abi, in the week before Christmas, went through two birthday parties, her first nativity play, her nursery Christmas party, a school fair and managed to meet Santa through sheer accident three times. She really didn't need your trip to the garden centre to see the pretty lights.<br />
<br />
4) For heaven's sake don't give the children chocolate, not even in their stockings. They are going to get far more of the sweet stuff than they could ever healthily eat, even if you try to ration it out over the whole year as an enticement to every meal, and you will end up scoffing it furtively and feeling guilty because it was meant for them.<br />
<br />
5) Sing. It's the thing Abi picks up quickest. I expect that next year, Jeremy will too. John Hardwick's songs mean that Abi already knows what angels say. How many carols tell the whole nativity story?<br />
<br />
6) Don't panic. When Abi wakes up at 6am screaming and sobbing that she doesn't want any presents, just go with it. Snuggle up in bed and talk about something else, and be grateful for an extra year that won't be ruled by materialism. Similarly, when Jeremy develops a fear of gifts and runs screaming whenever you try to give him one, just unwrap them all and hand over the toys. It may not feel quite right, but then neither does chasing a sobbing toddler around the house with a parcel. The day is never going to look the way it does in your head, whether you were anticipating schmaltz or catastrophe. If you relax about it, they'll enjoy it, whatever it looks like - and so will you.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-9649338211217143062013-10-22T03:36:00.000-07:002013-10-22T03:36:58.941-07:00Halloween<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I've just got home from giving a Halloween-themed assembly. No, I wasn't dressed as a witch or a pumpkin - I took in a bag of things that produce light and talked about how almost every culture throughout time has had a celebration involving light around this time of year. Some of the children were able to work out why that might be, and then we talked about Jesus saying "I am the light of the world".<br />
<br />
In the many and varied discussions going on in the Book of Face at the moment, I have mentioned that last year we went meet-and-treating, giving out heart-shaped biscuits and little messages to the trick-or-treaters we bumped into in the village. Some people have asked me for a copy of what the messages actually said; I can't find the originals anywhere, but I do remember the gist of them, so I thought I'd rewrite two alternatives in case people find them helpful this year. The first is for giving out heart-shaped biscuits or sweets, the second is for the healthy alternative of electric candles, glo-sticks or torches.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hearts:<br />
Nobody really knows where the festival of Halloween originated. The name comes from All Hallow's Eve, marking a time in the Christian church when we remember saints and loved ones who have died, but the traditions that take place come from much earlier pre-Christian times. In fact if you look at almost any culture in any time, you'll find that as the nights get longer, a festival takes place with traditions intended to ward off darkness and evil. It's humanity's way of dealing with darkness, death and the things that frighten us as we go into the long winter.<br />
In our family, we like to use Halloween to remember that as Christians, we believe that Jesus Christ has already dealt with darkness and death by dying and rising again. In the Bible it says that "Perfect love casts out all fear" (1 John 4:18) so this year, we're giving out heart-shaped sweets to remind us that when we know we are loved by Jesus, there's no need to fear the darkness.<br />
We hope you enjoy the treats, and have a safe and fun Halloween!<br />
<br />
<br />
Torches:<br />
Nobody really knows where the festival of Halloween originated. The name comes from All Hallow's Eve, marking a time in the Christian church when we remember saints and loved ones who have died, but the traditions that take place come from much earlier pre-Christian times. In fact if you look at almost any culture in any time, you'll find that as the nights get longer, a festival takes place which involves light, intended to ward off darkness and evil. That's where Jack-O-Lanterns come from, for example. It's humanity's way of dealing with darkness, death and the things that frighten us as we go into the long winter.<br />
In our family, we remember at Halloween that Jesus said "I am the light of the world". He has already conquered darkness and death by dying and rising again. This year, we're giving out Glo-sticks/torches to light your way and to remind you that Jesus has beaten the darkness!<br />
We hope you enjoy your treats, and have a safe and fun Halloween!<br />
<br />
<br />
I hope someone finds these helpful - and at least I'll now be able to find them again next year!</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-60459479453279863412013-08-30T13:36:00.000-07:002013-08-30T13:37:18.746-07:00Missiles<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Jeremy is currently very fond of throwing things. In fact, I'm a little bit worried that I might have given birth to a ball player of some kind. Of course that would be far too stereotypical for my liking - not to mention the fact that I wouldn't know what to do with him - but the child just loves anything spherical. He points at lampshades, no smoking signs and the Firefox icon on the computer screen and chirrups, "Baw! Baw! Baw!" until we are squirming from all the cute.<br />
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<br />
A less desirable side effect of all this is his dearly held belief that everything bounces. His plate, beaker and spoon end up on the floor at the end of every meal, leading to an inordinate amount of cleaning to be done at the end of every day - it's almost as if he was weaning all over again. And tonight, the habit could easily have landed us in A&E.<br />
<br />
Abi had done what I would term an emergency nappy. The kind where scooping her up and dealing with it takes priority over wondering what her brother is up to. I was just washing her hands in the basin of the downstairs toilet when Jeremy appeared at the doorway clutching a glass jar. In the time it took for me to gasp and reprimand myself for not clearing away the painting we'd been doing, he lobbed it at the floor with an unearthly chortle and it shattered into zillions of tiny glistening shards.<br />
<br />
Abi and I were stranded on an island consisting of the little toddler step, and the glassy sea around us was nothing like the one in Revelation. On the other shore, and about to take a step towards us, was Jeremy. That's six bare feet and an awful lot of broken glass.<br />
<br />
Without moving my feet, I leaned forward, scooped up Jeremy, tucked him under one arm and Abi under the other, and did a sort of striding leap, aiming for the carpet beyond the doorway. I missed. I landed on a needle of glass that went straight into the ball of my foot, at which I took off again and dropped the children in a heap in the middle of the hallway carpet.<br />
<br />
When I was explaining all this to TheRev later on, he said thoughtfully, "I would have just scooted the step along, and used it as a stepping-stone to get to into the hall". Yes, of course you would, because you still have a brain. My children have taken my brain hostage, and they won't give it back. I'm not sure what the ransom price is, but I suspect it's something in the region of twenty more years hobbling about picking up shards of glass after bedtime.</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3737309514312005149.post-50135767293837258562013-07-01T13:56:00.000-07:002015-04-19T11:22:29.419-07:00Y,O,G,H,U,R,T<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
TheRev: Do you think Abi would like a Y,O,G,H,U,R,T?<br />
<br />
Me: I don't know. Abi, would you like a Y,O,G,H,U,R,T?<br />
<br />
Abi: Yes please!<br />
<br />
Me: (suspiciously) Do you know what a Y,O,G,H,U,R,T is?<br />
<br />
Abi: A blue one?<br />
<br />
Me: A blue one?! (She doesn't know her colours, so this could mean anything) What do you do with a Y,O,G,H,U,R,T?<br />
<br />
Abi: I put it in a pot and I paint it on the wall!<br />
<br />
Heaven knows what she thought I was talking about...then again, her assessment of what she would do with it is probably not all that far from reality!</div>
A(me)http://www.blogger.com/profile/06407417460797812800noreply@blogger.com1