Friday, 7 August 2015

The Muffin Queen

TheRev: I'd quite like a muffin.
Me: Oh, we don't have any.  But we do have crumpets.  I'd quite like a crumpet.
TheRev: They're the same thing. Some people call crumpets, muffins.
Me: Nonsense.  Crumpets and muffins are completely different.
TheRev: Well, I'd still like a muffin.
Me: Sorry, we don't have any, but would you like a crumpet?
TheRev: I can call them muffins if I like.
Me: Look, there are two different things that a muffin could mean, and neither of them is a crumpet.
TheRev: Who died and made you Muffin Queen?
Me: (Gingerbread Man voice from Shrek:) The muffin queeeen?!